Negotiating parenting when you and your partner have split up can be incredibly difficult. You may both be at loggerheads when it comes to custody or visiting arrangements and this can lead one party to feel undervalued and angry. 

Between 2019 and the end of 2023, 925 children were abducted by a parent, with almost half of these occurring in the capital. It is incredibly distressing for the children to be taken away from their parents as well as for the adults involved. Here are some signs to watch out for that may indicate your co-parent is planning on kidnapping your children. 

Unexpected changes in custody or visitation arrangements

One of the first things that needs working out when there has been a divorce or separation is custody and visitation arrangements. Sometimes this can take months of negotiation and butting heads.

Once a routine is established, any changes can be a sign that something isn’t quite right. Of course, sometimes situations cannot be avoided and require some compromise from both parties such as for illness, medical emergencies and work patterns changing. 

But sometimes changes in visitation and custody can be a cause for concern. This is especially true if there has been a lot of tension between the two families involved. Be aware of frequent changes and try to stick to any custody arrangements where possible. 

Concerning behaviour or statements from the other parent

Divorces and separations can often turn nasty, with both parents saying things they regret or don’t mean. Whilst this is a perfectly valid emotion, there are limits to what is acceptable. 

Take note of any statements that involve a wish to relocate with the child or expressing a lot of frustration with the custody arrangement. They could be a sign that a more permanent idea is taking root rather than just emotional venting. 

Be aware that it may not be the other parent that is expressing this. Sometimes other family members can be guilty of familial abduction. 

Attempts to isolate the child from the primary caregiver 

Children should never be used as pawns in a divorce or separation, but unfortunately, they often are. One parent may try to isolate them from their primary carer. This may be physically by keeping them in their custody for longer or emotionally by twisting their thoughts to be negative towards the carer. 

Feeling like your child is being isolated can be challenging as there is no real way to prove it. This is a good time to consult with experienced divorce and family lawyers to help make sure protective measures are in place.