One common saying often given as parenting advice is that parents shouldn’t be their children’s friends. There’s a lot of truth in this, because you are their parents first and foremost. You are responsible for keeping your children safe and for teaching them to grow up to be responsible, self-sufficient adults.

But there’s a danger in having the attitude that you can only be an authority figure to your children. You want to keep your kids physically safe and healthy, but what about their emotional wellbeing? Can you provide that kind of care if you aren’t friendly with your children?

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The Importance of Approachability

While your job is to sometimes be the bad guy, you can be the good guy an awful lot as well. This means your child will see you as someone they can trust and talk to when they need it. As your kids get older, they will drift away from you and towards people their own age.

This is a good thing, it’s natural for them to do. But when they get into trouble, you don’t want them to ask little Billy down the street for their advice, because little Billy frankly doesn’t know what he’s talking about. You want your children to come to you.

The only way for your kids to see you as an approachable figure is if they spend time with you. So give yourself opportunities to do this. Look for times when you can talk in a relaxed setting.

Eating meals as a family can be a great way to naturally spend more time with your children each day. Look for some lovely dining furniture at Shawcross so you can equip your home for your family’s needs.

Discipline With Love

When you do have to be the bad guy, don’t just do it out of anger. Children are annoying, it’s a fact. They will almost certainly make you angry at some point, but discipline shouldn’t be about hurting them to make you feel better. 

When your child does misbehave, look for a way to educate them. Discipline literally means teaching, and punishments should have a purpose beyond giving you a way to vent your frustrations. 

Explain why you’re disciplining your child and what they did wrong. Often, kids just don’t think things through, which is why they make mistakes. Even if they did misbehave deliberately, you can explain why that’s a problem. Give them time to learn and make more mistakes.

Know When to Give Them Space

As strange as it sounds, giving your children space can be a great way to bring you closer as a family. This does come with balance, of course, but kids will naturally want to become more independent. Act as a safety net, not body armour.

This means that your kids will look back on things like holidays where they could play with their friends as good memories, rather than remembering that their parents wouldn’t leave them alone.